Not someone who mugs you, or kills someone while driving drunk, those are just criminals. I mean VILLAINS.
Not like trump or musk, who are… cartoonishly evil. And not sexy villains, not grandiose villains, not even satisfyingly two dimensional villains it is easy to hate unconditionally. The real villains.
I had a client who was a retired executive for one of the big oil companies, i think it was Shell or Chevron. Had a home just outside of San Francisco that was wall to wall floor to ceiling full of expensive art. Literally. I once accidentally knocked a painting off the wall because it was hanging at knee height at the corner of the stairs, and it had a little brass plaque on it, and i looked up the name of the artist and it was Monet’s apprentice and son-in-law, who was apparently also a famous painter. He had an original Andy Warhol, which should have been a prize piece for anyone to showcase – it was hanging in the bathroom. I swear to god this guy was using a Chihuly (famous glass sculptor) as a fruit bowl. And he was like, “idk my wife was the one who liked art”
I was intrigued by this guy, because in the circles i run this dude is The Enemy. right? Wealthy oil executive? But as my client, he was… like a sweet grandpa. A poor widower, a nice old man, anyone who knew him would have called him a sweetheart. He had a slightly bewildered air, a sort of gentle bumbling nature.
And the fact that he was both of these things, a Sweet Little Old Man and The Enemy, at the same time, seemed important and fascinating to me.
He reminded me of some antagonist from fiction, but i couldn’t put my finger on who. And when i did it all made sense.
John Hammond.
probably one of the most realistic bad guys ever written.
If you’ve only ever seen the movie, this will need some explaining.
Michael Crichton wrote Jurassic Park in 1990, and i read it shortly thereafter. In the movie, the dinosaurs are the antagonists, which imo erases 50% of the point of the story.
book spoilers below.
In the book, John Hammond is the villain but it takes the reader like half the book to figure that out. Just like my client, John is a sweet old man who wants lovely things for people. He’s a very sympathetic character. But as the book progresses, you start to see something about him.
He has an idea, and he’s sure it’s a good one. When someone else dies in pursuit of his dream, he doesn’t think anything of it. When other people turn out to care about that, he brings in experts to evaluate the safety of his idea, and when they quickly tell him his idea is dangerous and needs to be put on hold, he ignores his own experts that he himself hired, because they are telling him that he is wrong, and he is sure he is right.
In his mind, he’s a visionary, and nobody understands his vision. He is surrounded by naysayers. Several things have proven too difficult to do the best and safest way, so he has cut corners and taken shortcuts so he can keep moving forward with his plans, but he’s sure it’s fine. He refuses to hear any word of caution, because he believes he is being cautious enough, and he knows best, even though he has no background in any of the sciences or professions involved. He sends his own grandchildren out into a life-threatening situation because he is willfully ignorant of the danger he is creating.
THIS is like the real villains of the world. He doesn’t want anyone to die. Far from it, he only wants good things for people! He’s a sweet old man who loves his grandchildren. But he has money and power and refuses to hear that what he is doing is dangerous for everyone, even his own family.
I think he’s possibly one of the most important villains ever written in popular fiction.
In the book, he is killed by a pack of the smallest, cutest, “least dangerous” dinosaurs, because a big part of why we read fiction is to see the villains face thematic justice. But like a cigarette CEO dying of lung cancer, his death does not stop his creation from spreading out into the world to continue to endanger everyone else.
I think it is really important to see and understand this kind of villainy in fiction, so you can recognize it in real life.
Sweetheart of a grandfather. Wanted the best for everyone. Right up until what was best for everyone inconvenienced the pursuit of his own interests.
And my client was like that too. His wife had died, and his dog was now the love of his life, and she was this little old dog with silky hair in a hair cut that left long wispy bits on her lower legs. Certain plant materials were easily entangled in this hair and impossible to get out without pulling her hair which clearly hurt her. When i suggested he ask his groomer to trim her lower leg hair short to avoid this, he refused, saying he really liked her usual hair cut.
I emphasized that she was in pain after every walk due to the plant debris getting caught in her leg hair, and a simple trim could put an end to her daily painful removal of it, and he just frowned like i’d recommended he take a bath in pig shit and said “But she’ll be ugly” and refused to talk about it anymore.
I got a laptop with Windows 11 for an IT course so I can get certified, and doing the first time device set-up for it made me want to commit unspeakable violence
Windows 11 should not exist, no one should use it for any reason, it puts ads in the file explorer and has made it so file searches are also web searches and this cannot be turned off except through registry editing. Whoever is responsible for those decisions should be killed, full stop.
Switch to linux, it’s free and it’s good.
u r absolutely right I have SO many complaints about Windows omg.
For anyone who’d like to follow along, I’m gonna share how to get around those things with group policies bc they’re more user friendly and descriptive than registry editor imo :3 I’ll also show how to get around needing a Microsoft account to get setup.
For the Device Setup
“OOBE” stands for Out Of Box Experience which is what that setup workflow is. But it also happens to be a folder with a little program in it that’ll let you skip connecting to the internet; this makes it so you don’t have to sign up with a Microsoft account and can just use a normal local one instead. And it already comes preinstalled! Here’s how you get to it:
Hold Shift+ F10, or Shift + Fn + F10 depending on your keyboard.
Click inside the window that pops up, type the following and press enter afterwards to run it: OOBE\BypassNRO
I believe it should restart your computer automatically, but if not then restart your computer or type: shutdown /r /t 0 /f
Now when you’re brought back to the setup workflow, the page where you connect to the internet will have a new button on it that lets you say you don’t have internet. Clicking that and proceeding through the rest of the setup lets you get around the Microsoft account thing.
Group Policies
You don’t have to know much about them, these are just a bunch of specific settings for what your computer can or can’t do that lets you decide how it works in different ways.
I’m gonna show you how to turn off the recommendations and internet stuff basically. For now bring up search and type gpedit, pick this
It’ll open up to Local Group Policy Editor and we can get started :3c
Start Recommendations
In the side menu, go to User Configuration > Administrative Templates > Start Menu and Taskbar. Click on Settings to sort them with all the “Turn off” ones bumped to the top.
Here’s what you should set:
Turn off user tracking: enabled
Turn off feature advertisement balloon notifications: enabled
Remove Recommended section from Start Menu: enabled
Remove Personalized Website Recommendations from the Recommended section in the Start Menu: enabled
Do not search Internet: enabled
Windows Spotlight
Back in the side menu, go down to Windows Components > Cloud Content
Turn off all Windows spotlight features: enabled
Do not use diagnostic data for tailored experiences: enabled
Cortana
In the side menu, this one’s back at the top under Computer Configuration. You’re gonna want to go to Computer Configuration > Administrative Templates > Windows Components > Search
Allow Cortana: disabled
Don’t search the web or display web results in Search: enabled
News and Interests
In the side menu go to Computer Configuration > Administrative Templates > Windows Components > News and interests.
Enable news and interests on the taskbar: disabled
Microsoft Account Login Nudges
When you don’t use a Microsoft account they’ll nudge you repeatedly to sign in so you can “get the most out of your experience” *gag*. The group policy for turning that off has a note that suggests it might not work with Windows 11 though (implicitly), so you can close the group policy editor window now and for this last one let’s just open up the regular settings.
Go to System > Notifications > Additional settings, then uncheck all the boxes. And there ya go! (✿◠‿◠)ﾉ u are done.
Group policies are kind of a rabbit hole so while there is a lot more you could change or read into, for your own sanity’s sake I would advise against it and say call it a day lol
This is all extremely good information, thank you very much for the addition!
I endorse this as an IT technician. I do this to every new Win11 device I set up.
As a bonus, run Chris Titus Tech’s debloat tool on it.
It allows you to add tools, remove/disable shitty parts of windows, and easily change some settings. My default is running the preset for a desktop/laptop and applying security update settings, but there are so many options to customize. I used it on my personal laptop.
It’s all fun and games until you get locked out of your fridge because you didn’t pay ColdCorp $10 this month to upgrade to premium cold air in the AdFridge9000.
I don’t normally talk about politics here, but come on. There’s no way any actual person will see this take as controversial
sad news, my son Crispin Shopify III saw a picture of me when i was breastfeeding him as a baby. the psychiatrists all agreed that exposure to this act which is potentially incestuous and sexual was equivalent to infinite permanent sexual trauma, and so we’ve decided to euthanize him and just start again from the beginning. hopefully i wont fuck it up again this time. god bless.
A tech company will replace a pop-up that says “This is your computer” with one that says “I’m your computer! :)” and people will demand we grant it civil liberties
People will be like “I’m concerned about people treating the database querying tool with dialogue boxes that say ‘I found’ instead of 'Here is’ unethically and causing it harm” and expect to be taken seriously
Against AI rights not in a “we should have slurs for robots and oppress the robots” way (that’s weird and besides they’re called toasters go watch Battlestar Galactica), but in a “sincerely asserting that inanimate objects are capable of experiencing oppression in a way comparable to human beings or that negative public perception of a goddamn phone app is somehow comparable to racism is itself a position so clownishly racist it’s like something a character in a children’s cartoon would say to signal to the audience that he’s the asshole” way
